From a Reader of Dear Calvary (June 26, 2022)


Dear Calvary,

On June 24, 2022 the Supreme Court overturned  Roe v. Wade. 

Why am I telling you this? Because apparently your pastor is unaware of this fact. This Sunday morning, while millions of Christians rejoiced and celebrated the defense of the unborn, thanking and praising God for His victory, Star Scott did a teaching on what length you should or shouldn't wear your shorts.  And though he is delivering this landmark message about the length of your shorts, he wants you to know that because YOU have an opinion about other people's shorts, YOU are a fornicator. Oh, and Star Scott reminded everyone that HE gets to decide how long you can wear your shorts in HISchurch. Because he's the boss. And don't forget, all of you are filled with lust. (by the way, at the mall you can wear your shorts any length because the people there are already going to hell so you don't have to worry about causing them to stumble). 

Thankfully, the shorts problem is solved.
And thankfully, God is on His throne.


Messenger said…
Gee, I wonder if Star Scott will preach on the Roe v Wade decision tonight, now that the pressing shorts problem has been solved.
Anonymous said…
Gee wiz Mr. Scott, is my dress long enough or is my collar appropriate? Do I need to wear a moo-moo or a figure obscuring sweater or jacket over my clothing since I am a woman?How else am I to please you? Do I need to lick your shoes clean or scrub your car with an extra soft toothbrush? What is it that I can please you with next? **Insert extreme sarcasm here**