A Letter from a New Yorker (December 23, 2016)

Dear Molly,

     I want to thank you for your stand of openness and honesty regarding what was done to you and your family by Calvary Temple. As well I would like to express admiration for the others who speak out about their abuse at the hands of this church. Having known you and your family for thirty years, it's been heartbreaking to see the lies and horrific division of a family loved and admired---by a church! As well as, unfortunately, some church people up here. Thank God it is (because of your consistent stand of openness and personal integrity), FINALLY coming into the open. Through the steady and courageous effort of yourself, and the other writers on your Dear Calvary Temple Blog, along with the other blogs I have been following called Tactics of Calvary Temple, and Leaving Calvary Temple, and Expose Calvary Temple, and Against Calvary Temple. Not to mention the protests of brave people for a whole year down there is Virginia, every week, against the alleged abuses occurring at the church there.
     Well, needless to say, you are all heroes to those of us watching, praying, and standing with you Molly. I know your heart is broken. I have watched with awe the kindest care and forgiveness to your husband for the awful things he did to you and Gretel. I am so happy he has come to his senses and is honestly dealing with the terrible things he participated in. We are here for you guys. And wish there was more that we could do. What we are doing, is warning every young person and parents, that we find out is in any way on social media with people we know at Calvary Temple. We warn them to do the research themselves, to read everything they can on the church, and we give them your phone to call you and Gretel to be told the truth about what is happening. We warn them to question anything they are told by individuals inside Calvary Temple, and ask difficult questions, to share all information they are told with their parents, and or pastors, in order to fact-check. Especially in light of the prevalence of lies told.
     I know that if there is a shred of decency in the people that run that church down there, they will repent for what they have done to your family and kids, and make amends. And if not, people here and there, are warned, and hopefully, no more lives entangled in a corrupt church. Personally, I agree that it is the pastors who are responsible for this. Not the poor souls who have been lied to and love bombed.
     None of us like to think about a pastor or church being corrupt. But we must face the facts, there are people that are doing very terrible things, that are running churches. It must be exposed and dealt with, hopefully biblically. God does not expect us to cover up abuse and lies. He is fearless regarding the truth, and so must we be fearless. Along with loving and showing compassion and patience with people who have been terrorized and victimized. You have been through hell, and from what I have learned these past years, so have dozens of other folks. Some cannot even speak of it, they are traumatized to such a degree, it has altered their whole lives. We are here for you Molly, for Tom, for Gretel and for all those brave people who have shared their painful stories with us. God bless you. We are standing and praying. Don't give up. Soon your family will be reunited, and all the others too.

The reason some individuals are unnamed is because they have found out or already know that Pastor Scott will inquire after them, and denigrate their names from the pulpit. It has been reported, by some individuals inside the church, that this occurs, and no one needs that kind of abuse, for speaking up publicly. So, unless the person is absolutely sure they wish to be identified, the letters are not signed.

Letter to the Christian Brothers & Sisters at Calvary from Patty Simoneau (December 11, 2016)

Dear true Christian brother and sisters at Calvary Temple,

     What you are doing to families and marriages in the Name of Jesus is NOT BIBLICAL. Situations have been falsely portrayed and misrepresented. ANYTHING TAKEN OUT OF CONTEXT IS FALSE. Period!!! I believe these actions are devilish and brought about through the leadership at Calvary temple. Jesus is not in any of this . After our abuse at Calvary Temple eight years ago, we began attending Cornerstone Chapel in Leesburg.
     We are now in a church that teaches through the Bible. You learn the full counsel of Gods word, not the cherry picking that Calvary does. I remember before I left, seeing the word "anethema" above the stage. ( I cannot call it a pulpit because they are NOT true shepherds).This place teaches division and has set itself up for idolatry. I have never seen a more bitter people than those that are in CT. Who created that? Your pastor did.
     What did Bob Scott tell you about they way we were told to leave? That we abandoned you and our son? A lie, our doors have always been open to any of you. And our son forsakes us, not the other way around.
     We are not afraid to talk about it. Only the guilty ones don't want to talk about the truth nor look at the facts. It's easier to listen to a lie and shut your ears to the rest of us. Ask yourself, are you a child of God who walks in the light or are you a child of Satan who walks in darkness? God will continue to judge this place and bring everything into the light.
     HE WHO CONFESSES AND FORSAKES THEIR SIN, WILL FIND GODS GRACE AND MERCY. Bob Scott has talked bad about other churches, including ours.
     True pastors are men whom God has called to lead others to Christ. Not to a CHURCH. We the people make up the church, not a church building. Pastors are to be humble men who lift up Jesus. There will never be a perfect church, because God wants to keep our eyes on Him only.
     Blessed is the man who puts his trust in the Lord, they will never be ashamed. If any of you in Calvary temple have questions or red flags as Bob is talking up there, then listen to other churches live feed services. We have live feed services because only God's word is taught, and we walk in the light, so no need to edit sermons. Like Calvary temple does. This is darkness, not open and above board. Ask God to show you the truth. Know God's word, so you will not sin against God. EVERY KNEE WILL BOW TO HIM. EVERY LIAR WILL FIND THEMSELVES IN THE LAKE OF FIRE. I know that those of you that want Jesus, not a church, will hear his voice and do what's right. God is watching.
     If you do have any questions, you can always call and talk to our pastor or any in the area. Everyone is aware now of what is going on at Calvary Temple. They would gladly sit and answer any questions. Please do it sooner than later! Jesus is coming soon to take his bride home.

Diligently interceding for our families,
Patty Simoneau


Letter to My Children (November 24, 2016)

My children and grandchildren, kept from their parents and family since 2011. They celebrated Thanksgiving with church members who are supporting the pastors in stealing children from their own parents. We are heartbroken at this travesty of all that is good And right. Please God, how much longer till I can hug and talk to my own precious wonderful children.

Photo sent to us from a stranger

Letter to My Children (November 24, 2016)

Dear Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua and Christina,

Happy Thanksgiving Day. The 5th Thanksgiving without you all. I don't know how we have made it so far without going crazy. How does a pastor justify keeping children from parents? And keeping my grandchildren from us? You are loved. I will feed you, clothe you, provide for you, comfort and help you all. There is nothing you can do to make me love you less. Your little nephews were here tonight, helping gramma with her button jar. Tomorrow, on Thanksgiving day, we will endure our sadness with others who also know pain and sorrow. I can't wait until you are in my arms again.

With all my love and kisses and hugs,
Your own mom XO

Letter to My Children (November 11, 2016)

Dear Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua and Christina,

     I love you all. Soon, the truth will win out and we will all be together again. Everywhere it seems the secrets of corruption are being revealed. And those who are not corrupt, but behaved wrongly, are also being revealed. I believe it was David Wilkerson who said that God would reveal the sins of all leaders both in the church and in the world before judgement came. It is right for leaders who do wrongly to admit it, apologize and make amends. It is right for those who hide their badness to be exposed. John 3: 21 says Let your deeds be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.
     I was thinking this morning of how little you probably know about when I was placed in the motels away from you all for over 90 days. It was a nightmare. I barely slept, cried, and waited. Waited for you all to come and find me. I worried about who was taking care of Josh and Christina, who was watching baby Noah as Gretel worked? When I came back Gretel and Noah were gone, again silence.  More abuse covered up. Candace was about to be kicked out. A elementary child was kicked out, the mom told me, crying. I was terrified, what was going on? How could Pastor Scott be allowing all this to happen? Was he not aware? Was Pastor Ron Zarou a rogue pastor? Doing his own thing, covering up his tracks? (I have been told by so many individuals how  this same pastor divided their families also. What the heck?)
      Upon being brought home by dad, and told by Pastor Ron Zarou to not talk about my discipline (his words), because it would be getting sympathy from you; I began to realize you also had either been told nothing, or told not to discuss it with me. So I was silent some more.  As directed, and to keep dad and Pastor Ron from punishing me again. For two months I was quiet, then it started on dad, that evening after service, when all you adult kids rebuked him for buying lunch for Gretel and Noah and talking to her. I could not be silent, and as Carolyn looked across the sanctuary and smiled at me sitting there, she gave me courage to speak up against injustice. Carolyn had repeatedly told me to stand up to Ron Zarou, and not let him bully me. When Jonathan asked me to say something that night, I stood and told you children you were wrong to shame dad.
     I saw Carly's face get red, and Sarah put her head down. And I knew I was in trouble again. For being a good mom. For reminding my children to be decent, loving and kind. And then, I was removed from church, and two weeks later, on Christmas Day, after you arrived home from the service I was not permitted to attend with my family, (or go anywhere else for that matter), I was told to leave and support myself for up to a year if that's what it took to get ride of the 10% of darkness in me???!!!!!! Even while telling me I was a great mom, and a good wife. Your words guys, not mine. And I replied, This is not right. This is wrong. And if you will do this to me, you will one day do this to your wives and children. Christians should not be dividers of families. I am not picking on you kids, dad has admitted he wronged us terribly. Pastor Ron Zarou needs to admit his part and Pastor Scott also, as head pastor.
     I love you all, and cannot wait till this is over. I am not angry with you. And, for healing to begin, the unhealed wounds must be opened and disinfected, and then with truth and love, healing begins. Your plugging your ears to what happened is not Christlike. Look at all that has been done to your parents and sister and nephew, and mourn and restore. The truth will set us free.

Love and hugs and kisses, Mom

Letter to My Children and Friends (October 31, 2016)

Dear Children and Friends,

 I saw this movie and cried. I thought you should all see it. More and more I think the only people who have courage to look on evil and weep are the sweetest of souls. Or perhaps those close To death through old age, and their inborn desire to preserve themselves is fading. Children Look on our situation and cry. Because with all my heart, I believe God looks on it and cries. And then get off your knees and do something, anything, please TRY to get your parents back, please come knock on my door as I have on yours. Please call and text my phone as I have yours. Please call and ask my pastor friends to put in a word for you as I have done with yours. You will not be turned away. You will be welcomed with open arms and love. No matter what you have done or what you have become-come home. Others may condemn you, I will never. Others may blame you, I do not. As long as we have each other, it doesn't matter what others say.

We are family.
XO Mom

Dear Mrs. Fitch from a Friend (October 23, 2016)

Hi Mrs. Fitch,

You know for a long time I didn't read any of the blogs. Different people told me about them but I want to forget everything to do with Calvary Temple. I don't trust people anymore. Recently I pulled up your blog and read it, for two hours! And I cried for you and your kids. Your family was one of the nicest families I've ever known. And what they did to you and your kids makes me angry. I just don't get what motivates Pastor to persecute the best people. Like he's jealous of others happy families or just gets a kick out of seeing if he can get people to cut off their own families.

But your kids always loved you so much. They used to brag about what a great mom they had, and how they loved the way they were raised up in NY. And when you came to visit you were kind and just as sweet Jonathan and Sarah boasted you were. Everyone loved you. But the pastors had it in for your kids to get them from you. But you didn't realize. You really thought Pastor Scott was godly. Candace and Sarah started to see things, but Pastor clamped that down fast. He's a born liar. Sorry if it offends you to hear that, but it's the truth. He says whatever he wants to each of us. Never mind the facts. He manipulates all of us all the time, why do you think the pastors and deacons are always having counseling meetings in the back with different ones? And in school, all it is is control and discipline. The only ones exempt are leaderships kids. But we were trained to not share that stuff with our parents. Your kids  were taught the same.

I guess I just want to say, you are a nice lady Mrs. Fitch. And I am really sorry about what Calvary Temple did to you and your kids. And Mr. Fitch, And Gretel. I think your kids will be back with you soon. They know, deep down, that this is not right to do this to you. And hopefully soon they will break free of the control, like so many of us have already done. And then they will see what they did was wrong. If you are ever in Virginia, please let me know.

Wish you all the best,
Your friend

Letter to My Children (September 30, 2016)

"Nobody is stronger...than someone who came back. There is nothing you can do to such a person because whatever you could do is less than what has already been done."~Elie Weisel

Dear Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua, and Christina,

So much has been happening, I often think of that song, which says we will have a lot to catch up on when we see each other again. How to recapture 5 years of living? Anyway we just attended a wedding of one of your old friends. Gretel was also standing up in the wedding. Just beautiful. And the young man, reminds of Jonathan. His happy, responsible, clear-headed thinking ways. At least the Jonathan we raised was like that. I know now how Calvary Temple changes lives horrifically. Ruining the God-given personalities and turning the young people and adults into robots.

Several interesting conversations recently. I heard that Candace had an encounter with her husbands mother, who for the first time saw her two grandbabies. A heartbreaking few minutes, in which she was told that she could be part of her son and his children's lives if she would agree with Pastor Scott. This brave lady said that she is not bitter against all the evil this man had done to her or her family. She loves Jesus and knows God will fight for her family to be restored to her, because she has done nothing wrong. God bless her for her strength of character and integrity. Someday her grandbabies will rise up and call her blessed, for speaking the truth in love. (Candace is caught in a trap. She knows what is going on in Calvary is wrong, but they have threatened her before, to take her own children from her, if she doesn't submit to them. My daughter Sarah, told me this just before I was put away for the second time. Candace knows. Candace is trapped.)

So following that visit, a neighbor came by, one of our children's old babysitters. She showed me my Sarah's Facebook recent posts. It broke my heart. To see them out playing and laughing on this day (it was the birthday of Sarah's sister Gretel). And none of our four children texted or called to wish their sister a happy birthday or love. We always call and text and write on their birthdays (even though we get no response.) But none for Gretel or her children, or our extended family, or we the parents. So I asked if I could write a message on the face book to Sarah since she has blocked all of our relatives from seeing her posts. After I wrote the message, she blocked the sweet friend and former babysitter from seeing her posts. I guess she doesn't want to have her conscience stirred up by speaking or reading anything about the family she has 'killed for Pastor Scott.' It is not about God. It is about idolatry of a pastor.

The third conversation was later in the day, with a young Russian lady who was at Stoneybrooke Park, where we went for a creek hike. She, as a recent immigrant, expressed her surprise at how fearless Americans are to speak their displeasure with the direction of our country and those leading it at the moment. In Russia, she said if you do that, you can lose your job or end up in jail. You just must be quiet about bad things, and not mention them publicly. And it made me think of the culture at Calvary Temple. All those years bad things were happening, so many, and no one mentioned anything to me from inside the church. None of the supposedly upright, godly, men of integrity, came to Tom or I and warned us that things were unsafe there, not as they appeared. In fact, when I did question two men in leadership that I respected, they both pooh-poohed all my questions and concerns. Explaining them away with Scriptures. Very well I might add. I totally believed them. And they lied to me.

Finally, Calvary Temple's abuses and lies are perpetrated on the backs of these supposedly fine, upstanding, godly men and women. It could not happen up here in NY. First of all, we all know each other up here. And two strikes and you are out. We know your aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins. Lots of people to check out if you are legit. And if you are unknown, you are not trusted, period. And if you are known, and do bad things, you are not trusted.  That is why Sterling, Virginia has a Calvary Temple, lots of immigrants, and newcomers looking for jobs in the DC area. Especially the bright, handsome and lovely young people who were well raised by good parents in other states. Beware. Don't judge a book by its cover. They look good, but you need to talk to people who refuse to go there, or did go there. They will explain what goes on underneath. We don't have to be afraid, like people who have grown up under repressive governments. As Christians, it is our duty to reprove, rebuke and exhort with all diligence as the day draws near. Like Jesus did with the wicked religious leaders of his day. Don't be afraid to say the truth to those you encounter from Calvary. We should not play the game of silence and lies. We walk in the light, and let the deeds be made manifest whether or not they are wrought in God.

This is the way I raised you children. This is why Pastor Scott does not want me in your lives anymore. You are young, naive and gullible. I am a bit older, smarter, and wiser. Listen to your mother. In some cases, the pastor is not always right. If he is a pastor at all. After all, Paul warned us that in the last days, grievous wolves would enter in and not spare the flock. Heed Paul's warning, the truth is not afraid of the light. Talk to us, talk to those that are 'marked' for speaking the truth to Pastor Scott. Talk to those who have left because they couldn't stomach all the bad things anymore. You will not go to jail or hell for hearing both sides of a matter. Thank God. Truth is fearless. Jesus said he did not come to give a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind.

You are all in my prayers and heart with love, and soon we will be together again.


Letter to Pastor Scott from a Former Member of Calvary Temple for 20+ Years (September 7, 2016)

To Pastor Scott,

Stop lying to the Fitch kids. Stop lying to the people. You never yet have told them the truth about their family members. You've lied about why Chuck, Richard, Neil, Keith, Ken, Larry, Paul, Wayne, Hugh, Ron, John, and all their wives have left or been shunted out. You've lied to the people about their kids who have been thrown out and or left. The only people who know the truth, partially, are those who are or were on your payroll. And they are cowards.

You give those kids back to their mom. I am sick of you terrorizing families into silence in order to get to see or hug their child or spouse for a few minutes. This is nuts. I swear to God, every chance I get, I will tell their and your stories. No one who is not a complete idiot or creep, will want to associate with you.

Give those kids back to their mother, Star Scott. You are no pastor.

Letter to My Children (September 3, 2016)

Dear Dear Children,

I love you. Loving you is all I know. I love your dad, even when he put me away in a motel and rented room for 3 months, on Pastors recommendation. I just held both of you, Sarah and Christina. Driving by your house, I thought I spotted you both. So I pulled in that there you were. It's the first time I have held my Christina since the fall of 2012, I think. But just now I hugged my baby girl, and kissed her hair, and cried.

And then as I listened to how you feel I have to be kept away from you all because I was fearful back then, and all I think is what the heck. We had a terrible three years, of difficult family issues. There was so much going on behind the scenes in NY and in VA, that none of us knew anything about. It only was exposed just a couple of years ago. Of course I was afraid. We went through a lot. And then you said I must apologize to Pastor Scott for speaking against him by writing the blog. I asked if you read the blog.  First, I write to my children and those who are keeping them away from us. I tell what happened to me, because I highly doubt you know, as you have never been allowed to sit and talk to me, and ask me what happened. Second, Pastor Ron Zarou told me to NOT tell you anything about my discipline or the meetings we were made to attend (even though I begged Dad not to go to them). I have heard from other wives, husbands and children that have been put away, slandered and defamed and had their families taken from them, that my experience is also theirs. Nothing new at Calvary Temple, just new to me. Because we had only just moved there. And the church tapes, (Edited) don't talk about pastor telling husbands to put away their wives. Or their minor kids.

Heck, I would've NEVER believed this junk was happening, because I asked George Bright outright, and he said nope, that people left on their own accord, because they hate God. But that was not the truth. Was it George?

Between all the Baptist and Evangelical pastors and missionaries we are friends with, this (what has been done to our family by a ministry) is a grievous error of Scripture to take and separate husband and wife, and children from parents. Everyone you knew as children and were close to, that loves God and life, is horrified at what has happened to you kids. It makes no sense. I mean, we have not had perfectly sinless children, obviously, and yet never did we kick any of you out, and refuse to speak to you. Cutting you off for years because of what? We loved you and corrected you, and endured you patiently. Because that's the right thing to do. God changes hearts, not me. I love you always, even when you are naughty like now. I know God loves you even when you are naughty. I bless you, you shun me. I reach out to you. You lock the door on me. I cry and hug you, you point the finger and say to go and repent to Pastor Scott for writing you letters publicly. Because your dad told me you don't read my texts, snail mail, voicemails. And so what is a mother left to do, but write you openly, hoping someone will read it, that knows you, and tell you what I am saying.

That I love you. Dad is sorry for dividing our family, and he loves you. Gretel loves you. Your nephews and grandparents, and cousins and friends and relatives all love you. We miss you so much. You are needed desperately. Come home. Call. Or write. Tell me to come. Set up a meeting with your pastor Scott, and I will bring a witness, because after so many lies, I don't trust anyone but God. And I am not mad at your Pastor. I am sad that he has done this, keeping you from talking to me for 5 years! It is mind boggling. It is bizarre. It is crazy. No Christian does this. This is what the Muslims do, or the cults, or crazies. Please talk, sit and ask how we are doing, sit and let us tell you what we went through. When you were kept away from us for all this time. Let us ask you what you went through. Let us weep and talk and be a family again.

Until then, I will keep knocking on your doors, I will keep writing, I will even give interviews which I have avoided doing in the past. I will let the articles be written in newspapers, I will not avoid the calls from major media outlets. Because I have nothing to hide. It's all out there. And your hiding from me, not talking, only makes you all look guilty of something sinister.

And I will speak hoping that no one else has to endure what our family has had to endure, and so many other families have endured. And I love you so much. I long for God to take me to heaven, but maybe I am the only wounded person who is bold enough to make our horror story public. If I cared about my reputation, I would not say anything, but Pastor has turned my children against me and us, so what the heck. Nothing but the truth matters. Truth crushed to the ground will rise again. And it is rising. All the secret meetings and things being done, are being revealed and I am glad. Because only bad things are done in secret. The good things are made open and manifest for all to see IF they are really good or not.

I love you and will continue to try to you. Ok. So if you want me to be quiet. Then tell pastor Scott to give you all back to us. And he doesn't even need to apologize to me for what he and his leaders have done to me. That's between him and God. Just give us back our babies. All of them, and their spouses, and their children and their animals, all of them. Nothing left behind. They don't have to move home to NY, they just need to be restored to us again as children that love and honor their mother and father and sister, etc.

You said I need to go to Pastor Scott and apologize for my blog, and we can be a family again. Why? Jesus is slandered all the time, and he doesn't take their families from them. No real good man would keep children from their parents until he feels vindicated. Lay your life down Pastor Scott, turn the other cheek if you feel hurt, and give me back the children I birthed and raised.

I love all men, I hate lies and evil. Give me back my children Pastor Scott, stop twisting them to hate their own parents and relatives. It is not right.I will say good things about you when you do good things to me by giving me back my own dear children. I will even help you be a good man if I am able. I am not vindictive, and you do not need to apologize to me. Because God has my back. You just talk to him. He covers me with his wings. And I trust him to right the wrongs.

Love you all dear Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua, Christina, and my dear little grand babies, Penny Rose, Weston, Jackson, and Madeline.

Love and hugs and kisses from your very own mom and gramma.

Letter to Pastor Starr R Scott (August 16, 2016)

Dear Pastor Starr R Scott

Please allow my children to talk to me. Please allow my children to come home and spend a few days with their mother, father, sister, nephews, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents. Please sir. You have kept them apart from us for over 5 years now. We are all devastated. Our hearts and lives are shattered. We have the best and most wonderful children. They loved and honored their parents, family. They never would have done this to us in a million years. I do not know what you have said to them to get them to cut us all off cold turkey for so long. No birthday calls, no Christmas gatherings, no calls or texts, married without our presence or knowledge, sick and in the hospital without calling to let us know our children were ill. Never getting to see our little grandchildren. Please sir. This is so wrong. It is not good to do this to people. You have started to let some people see their family members again. I have been told it's because no one wants to come to your church anymore. Please let me have my children back. I am broken-hearted. You wanted me broken remember. Well you have succeeded. I am never going to be the same after this. But I will never ever say that what you are doing is like Christ. It is wrong, and that is the plain truth.

Please call me sir. I have reached out to you numerous times through your ex-pastors and current pastors. I have been told you will destroy me by Pastor Richard Miller. I have been told by Pastor Wayne Hughes in NY that it will do no good. I have been told by Pastor Tony Wozniak in NY that you feel I am not humble enough to have my children back. God help us all. You are like a dictator. Not like a kind shepherd of the sheep. Even your own men are scared of you. Don't you think it's time to have mercy and just end this nonsense (as so many ex-CTers call this). We don't hate you. We will help you if we can. It's time to do the right thing.

Please give us back our children Sir. I beg you.

The mother of Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua and Christina Fitch- Molly Fitch

Letter to Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua and Christina from Denise (August 4, 2016)

Dear Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua and Christina,

     I turned 50 this past month, and didn't want to celebrate or make it into a big thing. Just a quiet dinner at home with family seemed like a good idea. But Jon and Sarah you know Andrew. 100 of our closest friends and family and a huge chicken bar-b-que was how we spent the day, all a surprise to me. I had tried so hard not think about it, hoping to just let it pass. Instead I remembered, some happy thoughts, some sad. Your mama was there with Dad and Gretel and her beautiful children, your nephews. She's an amazing Mom. So loving and calm and protective. Brought me right back to when Molly and I were young and raising our babies together. My goodness if I  am 50, Andrew will soon be 30. That means Jonathan had already turned 30 in May, and Sarah must be 28 cause Ad is 27, which makes Gretel and Gel 25. It also means I've know your Mom for 30 years. I was just 20 and pregnant with my first baby when my Mom said, "Honey I want you to meet someone, she is wonderful. She will be a great friend to you!" My Mom was right, 30 years later your Mom is still my best friend. 30 years Jon, as old as you are. I was there when you were born, you too Sarah, Gretel, Josh, Christina. I was there when your Mom had hip surgery, her only concern was you. When she got a pool because Jonathan and Sarah loved to swim, she knew it meant more work but that didn't matter to her, you did. So many memories, so much love. I witnessed you being raised, but more importantly I know you were loved. Loved, cared for, protected, taught right and wrong and it was your Mama. She was the example my Mom wanted me to learn from, and I thank God every single day for my mother's wisdom. This past year has been incredibly hard my Moms health is failing, she was always so strong. I try not to think about the future, mostly because I cannot imagine my life without her. All the while, even through her own grief, Molly has been by my side. I have a small understanding now of how you must feel, how your hearts must hurt. How you must miss the amazing mother God blessed you with. The beautiful sister, and nephews he graced you with. It's been 5 years, so much time lost, so many memories missed. Come home, call, visit, send a letter. You are loved, prayed for, sought after, remembered, never forgotten and never given up on.

All my love, thoughts and prayers.

Letter to My Children (July 15, 2016)

Dear Children,

     Recently I had the pleasure of seeing old friends. You remember Jeff and Danelle of Old Paths Church. It was an auspicious chance meeting (at the movie theatre last week), which resulted in seeing them both next day. We spoke for a couple hours. A lot to share about our experiences at Calvary. Cleared up some lies and answered lots of questions.
     They shared with me a (email or text?), which my Sarah had written someone in their church. In response to the question of why Sarah cannot talk to her mother?! The lengthy description of moms 'Sins' was startling. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Not just because it was untrue, mostly because it was purported to be from my daughter. My second born child. I didn't know what to think. What kind of pastor would fill a young adults head with lies and nonsense? And how did they get her to actually believe it?
     Anyway kids, we asked for a copy of the actual text or email, so that first of all, our family and friends up here can see it, Read it, and respond to it. Probably we will print it here on the blog. That is if all efforts of communicating with you children fail again. After all, the content which pertains to me (your mom), should have been directed to your mom (and the rest of our family), in the first place.  It should not have been sent to a stranger. Matthew 18:15-17. We are surprised that Sarah would be sneaky. I have tried to recall everything in the text, but there is so much, its best to have an actual copy so there is no mistake.
     Always we (and all others) were told by you, the following: 'can't uncover moms sins to others', or 'it would be gossip' or 'dad and mom know what they have done' or 'dad knows what he has to do'' or 'mom needs to repent for speaking against pastor' etc. Never have I or anyone else been given ANY reason for the evil being taken from you. Because there is none. Pastor has told you to hate us, and is keeping you from all of us, in order to keep you all for himself.  Pastor Miller had said that Pastor Scott is afraid of godly men and women. I guess that's us.
     Right away I tried to call you Sarah, and talk about this, but per usual,  I was not able to get through. I told some family about the things shared. And now will tell everyone else who is carrying the load of our brokenhearted family up here and in Virginia. I think it's best to document and verify. Injustice feeds off silence.
     The Truth scares bad people. So they try to silence and discredit the truthful. Victims are silent often because they have been battered and manipulated. When someone is able to talk about the crimes (and I understand being so bullied one cannot), bad people really are afraid. Afraid the truth will come out, and they will lose their power.
     Jesus said "let your deeds be made manifest (known), whether or not they are wrought in God.' And he also said "You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free." That is one of my daily prayers for you kids. I love you always and forever. No matter what you have done or been forced to do, come home. You are loved. We forgive you.


Letter to Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua, and Bean from Gretel (June 26, 2016)

Dear Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua, and Bean,

     This last week the boys and I have begun to add a nice long hike around post to our mornings. We love it and I feel like Noah grows up more everyday, as we walk and talk about everything under the sun! Today though he was unusually quiet as we started out. We had seen Kyle off to work, said good morning to our wonderful neighbor(who reminds me of you Sarah though I'm not quite sure why yet), and headed out to the library for books and socializing on the playground. Noah, after a little way of walking in silence began to talk though more seriously than usual.
     He said, "Mom, you know why I was so sad in the night?"( He had woken up fussing alittle the night before) I expected to hear of a very vivid dream which he tends to have and so I simply asked him, "why?" "I was talking to Jesus last night, and you know that man who has tricked uncle Jonathan, uncle Sarah, uncle Josh and aunt Christina? I told Jesus to tell that bad man that he can't control other people. I am in control of myself and my actions and he needs to be only in control of himself and his actions and not tell people what to do and trick them." I nodded my head and agreed as he went on. "I asked Jesus too to tell your brothers and sisters to come home. Cause Mima and Bompa and I love them so much, don't we, Mom? And you love them and so does dad and Johnboy! I told Jesus to tell them we love them and so should just come home now. I want them here for my birthday this year!" I could only nod my head and smile in agreement with him and his sweet little heart, so full of love and hope!
     We do love you all and miss you more than words can tell. Come home soon! No matter what you have done, we still want you and will always want you! I thank God for everyone of you and can't wait to have each of you back soon!

Love always.

Your Sister,

Letter to My Calvary Temple Friends (June 23, 2016)

Dear Calvary Temple friends (both in and out),

     Wrapped in a blanket this morning, enduring a headache and sipping coffee, while trying to concentrate on what I was reading, I was thinking of all the needless pain we have all suffered. Those being told to cut off their own flesh and blood, and those singled out to be sent away from their families for God only knows what. The shear insanity of this 'biting and devouring' of precious lives. So anyway, I have been thinking.
     What has kept me going more than anything, is the love I have for my children. I love them so much. They are wonderful kids, and I have always been proud and pleased to have such great kids. They did the fun and crazy things kids do, and I enjoyed assisting them in their efforts to live life to the fullest. I believe Jesus when he said he came to give us life and life more abundantly.
     The second thing that has kept me going, is preventing anyone else from suffering this horrible situation. So I resolved to tell my story publicly, after all efforts at private reconciliation were ignored or refused. Thus sounding a warning loud and clear to all sane and sensible individuals that maybe there is something wrong with this church, and at the very least, to do some serious vetting of the men at the helm. And to be especially cautious, with regards to ones immediate family, of allowing them to be influenced by anyone in this church.
     Of course, it then stands to reason, that if these two things are what is keeping me going. Then if the people inside CT (both pastors and people) would just let me have my children back in our life like normal families do, and if Pastor Scott calling me up and apologize and say he was sorry. Well then I would have no reason to write on this blog. Except to write about the children being back with me and the nobility of a pastor who can admit his sins and errors. And of course, I would forgive him. Imagine the instant popularity of a person who is that willing to admit wrongdoing. It is so incredibly rare today. He would become an overnight hero to multitudes of formerly abused individuals. I mean David was a hoodlum (adulterer, murderer, liar), but he became a hero when he took his public humbling well and repented publicly.
      He might even find all his enemies have now become his best friends. What a wonderful turn of events that would be. And think of the opportunities to rebuild fractured families and show the true love of Christ. Because Jesus did not shun anyone. He was never afraid of sin or being contaminated by it. Sin has no dominion over love. Love has dominion over sin. If pastor and his people are so afraid of catching a sin...maybe it's because they have no self-control?
     So if Calvary wants to stop having all this bad publicity, by which the way of truth is being evil spoken of, then they should come to all whom they have stolen from and restore what belongs to others. Then they will have some good publicity. After all, Jesus went about doing good and healing all that were oppressed of the devil. Some of them were deserving and some were not. Jesus did not come to destroy men's lives but to save them. And if he came to them and they rejected him, then he went to the next. He did not take anything away from them, or punish them. Because the goodness of God is poured out on the just and the unjust. There is a Judgment one day, and we will all stand before Him then, to give account. For right now, I think Calvary Temple would be better off admitting and righting their wrongs, and looking at their own sins, instead of trying to 'break everyone else of sin'. It's just not your job.

Letter to My Children (June 19, 2016)

Dear Children,

     It's Fathers Day, and dad has not heard from you. He doesn't reach out to you he says. I am not sure why. I know that I cannot stop reaching for my children. That is why I call and write and text. Not to pester, just because there isn't a moment when you are not near in my thoughts. Very warm here today. And heard good news from Virginia again, that Mike and Hannah have asked for forgiveness to their parents. How good and right. Of course, none of us would hold any of you to any account, we would just be glad to have you in our lives again. To be able to hug and touch you and hear your voices and talk. It will be the most wonderful gift of all. It just doesn't matter what was done in the past. God wants us to be together. And I will forgive anyone who has kept us apart. It takes a truly noble and strong individual to admit that they did wrong. Especially after years of silence, and so please don't be embarrassed ever. We all admire people who are straight up and just plain honest. I have told my story here in order to dispel all the rumors and lies. To bring clarity and openness instead of secrecy. On the advise of pastors and friends here, this was a last resort to let you hear my voice. And Jesus says to bring everything to the light, that our deeds may be made manifest whether or not they are wrought in God.
     On a lighter note, it was another very hot and dry day. So unusual and the crops need water.  The lake is down about a foot at least. This will make you laugh, we put in a dock extension, and forgot to move the hoist back out to deeper water, so now dads boat is high and dry. Until we get more water to let it down into! Lol. Gretel was recently out visiting Aunt Melody and the girls while Kyle had a on-call thing to do. It was a weekend visit, and they did hay and played in the river. Gretel said the boys loved it. And she was pretty nostalgic too.
     Below is a picture of our view on the south side of the cottage. Looks green here, just because we have more moisture I guess, not so green elsewhere. The golf course has been watering with sprinklers after dark. Too dry for June. I love you and miss you. Please call and or come. Whatever you need.

Love and hugs and kisses,
Your own Mom

Letter to Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua and Christina (June 8, 2016)

Dear Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua and Christina,

     I have heard how much rain and cloudy days you have received in the past couple months. Sounds so like typical NY weather, which you are familiar with.
      So I thought I would send you a picture of the first peonies to bloom here at the cottage. We had a late bloom on most things. Unusual. You recall all the peonies and lilacs and flowers, etc. we had at our yellow house. We all loved blooming times, when you each we're bringing me flowers to put on the table.
      Many of them live on at Aunt Jackie's house. As she took small chunks of things to plant in her gardens. And in Virginia, we tried several new plants, which did well. Do you remember how the grapes and Jacobs ladder climbing Rose bush (from Joelle too I think), flourished.
      At the Mazz house I had no heart for gardens. I did transplant raspberries from our yellow house, and my moms rhubarb. But that is all. Then we purchased this cottage. And we looked it over in winter, with moving in time in late May I think, and then what a surprise. Each month new plantings emerged. Many that I had had, and loved, and lost. There are varieties of lilacs, peonies, hydrangea, lily of the valley, irises, fern, myrtle, pachysandra, climber roses, grapes, apples, pears, herbs, flowering bushes, flowering trees from all around the world, even a bush named Carlyce...a bush with a lovely scent.
     Oh and Josh, there are giant old locust trees here. You always noticed the lovely scent they gave out in spring.  Plus a Creek, woods, gravel beach, hill for sliding, 2 bridges, and a nice wide porch for rocking and eating out. Now dad has his boat and dock in, and we are told, one of the best fishing spots on the lake for bass, pike, etc.  Well it's a gift to us to be sure. A place for dad to heal and recover, a place for me to be safe until you return to us. God was covering us with his wings surely, to enable us to heal after so much abuse.
     And it will be a retreat for you all too I pray. When you come back to us. We love you and pray for you and need you desperately. Come home. No matter what you have done, no matter what you have become, come home.

Mom, Dad, Gretel & her little family

Letter to Christina (June 2, 2016)

Dear Bean,

     Your photograph was sent to me by a Virginian. You are beautiful. As both of your sisters, but a little more like me. In fact, dad says you look like I did when we were dating.
     The Rocker is yours too, I just recovered it to go in your room at Abby's place. She's renting your Mazz. House, and agreed to let me make a Christina Room as a memorial to you and your siblings, to come home. It is nearly finished now. The photo and Rocker will go into the room. This weekend a missionary couple will be staying there, they are from Ukraine but Canadian, and will be teaching at a seminary in Harrisburg.
     Just a side note, did you know that Claire is having her wedding in the back lawns of the Mazz. House? Gretel and Kyle will come back before the wedding to help me do the flowers. She invited 500 people to come...can you imagine? Dad says we will need 6 port-a-potties! It is time to stand up and do the right thing, no matter how difficult Christina. Come home. We are waiting. Or call and we will come.

Mom and Dad and your sister and family