Letter to My Children (September 3, 2016)
Dear Dear Children,
I love you. Loving you is all I know. I love your dad, even when he put me away in a motel and rented room for 3 months, on Pastors recommendation. I just held both of you, Sarah and Christina. Driving by your house, I thought I spotted you both. So I pulled in that there you were. It's the first time I have held my Christina since the fall of 2012, I think. But just now I hugged my baby girl, and kissed her hair, and cried.
And then as I listened to how you feel I have to be kept away from you all because I was fearful back then, and all I think is what the heck. We had a terrible three years, of difficult family issues. There was so much going on behind the scenes in NY and in VA, that none of us knew anything about. It only was exposed just a couple of years ago. Of course I was afraid. We went through a lot. And then you said I must apologize to Pastor Scott for speaking against him by writing the blog. I asked if you read the blog. First, I write to my children and those who are keeping them away from us. I tell what happened to me, because I highly doubt you know, as you have never been allowed to sit and talk to me, and ask me what happened. Second, Pastor Ron Zarou told me to NOT tell you anything about my discipline or the meetings we were made to attend (even though I begged Dad not to go to them). I have heard from other wives, husbands and children that have been put away, slandered and defamed and had their families taken from them, that my experience is also theirs. Nothing new at Calvary Temple, just new to me. Because we had only just moved there. And the church tapes, (Edited) don't talk about pastor telling husbands to put away their wives. Or their minor kids.
Heck, I would've NEVER believed this junk was happening, because I asked George Bright outright, and he said nope, that people left on their own accord, because they hate God. But that was not the truth. Was it George?
Between all the Baptist and Evangelical pastors and missionaries we are friends with, this (what has been done to our family by a ministry) is a grievous error of Scripture to take and separate husband and wife, and children from parents. Everyone you knew as children and were close to, that loves God and life, is horrified at what has happened to you kids. It makes no sense. I mean, we have not had perfectly sinless children, obviously, and yet never did we kick any of you out, and refuse to speak to you. Cutting you off for years because of what? We loved you and corrected you, and endured you patiently. Because that's the right thing to do. God changes hearts, not me. I love you always, even when you are naughty like now. I know God loves you even when you are naughty. I bless you, you shun me. I reach out to you. You lock the door on me. I cry and hug you, you point the finger and say to go and repent to Pastor Scott for writing you letters publicly. Because your dad told me you don't read my texts, snail mail, voicemails. And so what is a mother left to do, but write you openly, hoping someone will read it, that knows you, and tell you what I am saying.
That I love you. Dad is sorry for dividing our family, and he loves you. Gretel loves you. Your nephews and grandparents, and cousins and friends and relatives all love you. We miss you so much. You are needed desperately. Come home. Call. Or write. Tell me to come. Set up a meeting with your pastor Scott, and I will bring a witness, because after so many lies, I don't trust anyone but God. And I am not mad at your Pastor. I am sad that he has done this, keeping you from talking to me for 5 years! It is mind boggling. It is bizarre. It is crazy. No Christian does this. This is what the Muslims do, or the cults, or crazies. Please talk, sit and ask how we are doing, sit and let us tell you what we went through. When you were kept away from us for all this time. Let us ask you what you went through. Let us weep and talk and be a family again.
Until then, I will keep knocking on your doors, I will keep writing, I will even give interviews which I have avoided doing in the past. I will let the articles be written in newspapers, I will not avoid the calls from major media outlets. Because I have nothing to hide. It's all out there. And your hiding from me, not talking, only makes you all look guilty of something sinister.
And I will speak hoping that no one else has to endure what our family has had to endure, and so many other families have endured. And I love you so much. I long for God to take me to heaven, but maybe I am the only wounded person who is bold enough to make our horror story public. If I cared about my reputation, I would not say anything, but Pastor has turned my children against me and us, so what the heck. Nothing but the truth matters. Truth crushed to the ground will rise again. And it is rising. All the secret meetings and things being done, are being revealed and I am glad. Because only bad things are done in secret. The good things are made open and manifest for all to see IF they are really good or not.
I love you and will continue to try to you. Ok. So if you want me to be quiet. Then tell pastor Scott to give you all back to us. And he doesn't even need to apologize to me for what he and his leaders have done to me. That's between him and God. Just give us back our babies. All of them, and their spouses, and their children and their animals, all of them. Nothing left behind. They don't have to move home to NY, they just need to be restored to us again as children that love and honor their mother and father and sister, etc.
You said I need to go to Pastor Scott and apologize for my blog, and we can be a family again. Why? Jesus is slandered all the time, and he doesn't take their families from them. No real good man would keep children from their parents until he feels vindicated. Lay your life down Pastor Scott, turn the other cheek if you feel hurt, and give me back the children I birthed and raised.
I love all men, I hate lies and evil. Give me back my children Pastor Scott, stop twisting them to hate their own parents and relatives. It is not right.I will say good things about you when you do good things to me by giving me back my own dear children. I will even help you be a good man if I am able. I am not vindictive, and you do not need to apologize to me. Because God has my back. You just talk to him. He covers me with his wings. And I trust him to right the wrongs.
Love you all dear Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua, Christina, and my dear little grand babies, Penny Rose, Weston, Jackson, and Madeline.
Love and hugs and kisses from your very own mom and gramma.
I love you. Loving you is all I know. I love your dad, even when he put me away in a motel and rented room for 3 months, on Pastors recommendation. I just held both of you, Sarah and Christina. Driving by your house, I thought I spotted you both. So I pulled in that there you were. It's the first time I have held my Christina since the fall of 2012, I think. But just now I hugged my baby girl, and kissed her hair, and cried.
And then as I listened to how you feel I have to be kept away from you all because I was fearful back then, and all I think is what the heck. We had a terrible three years, of difficult family issues. There was so much going on behind the scenes in NY and in VA, that none of us knew anything about. It only was exposed just a couple of years ago. Of course I was afraid. We went through a lot. And then you said I must apologize to Pastor Scott for speaking against him by writing the blog. I asked if you read the blog. First, I write to my children and those who are keeping them away from us. I tell what happened to me, because I highly doubt you know, as you have never been allowed to sit and talk to me, and ask me what happened. Second, Pastor Ron Zarou told me to NOT tell you anything about my discipline or the meetings we were made to attend (even though I begged Dad not to go to them). I have heard from other wives, husbands and children that have been put away, slandered and defamed and had their families taken from them, that my experience is also theirs. Nothing new at Calvary Temple, just new to me. Because we had only just moved there. And the church tapes, (Edited) don't talk about pastor telling husbands to put away their wives. Or their minor kids.
Heck, I would've NEVER believed this junk was happening, because I asked George Bright outright, and he said nope, that people left on their own accord, because they hate God. But that was not the truth. Was it George?
Between all the Baptist and Evangelical pastors and missionaries we are friends with, this (what has been done to our family by a ministry) is a grievous error of Scripture to take and separate husband and wife, and children from parents. Everyone you knew as children and were close to, that loves God and life, is horrified at what has happened to you kids. It makes no sense. I mean, we have not had perfectly sinless children, obviously, and yet never did we kick any of you out, and refuse to speak to you. Cutting you off for years because of what? We loved you and corrected you, and endured you patiently. Because that's the right thing to do. God changes hearts, not me. I love you always, even when you are naughty like now. I know God loves you even when you are naughty. I bless you, you shun me. I reach out to you. You lock the door on me. I cry and hug you, you point the finger and say to go and repent to Pastor Scott for writing you letters publicly. Because your dad told me you don't read my texts, snail mail, voicemails. And so what is a mother left to do, but write you openly, hoping someone will read it, that knows you, and tell you what I am saying.
That I love you. Dad is sorry for dividing our family, and he loves you. Gretel loves you. Your nephews and grandparents, and cousins and friends and relatives all love you. We miss you so much. You are needed desperately. Come home. Call. Or write. Tell me to come. Set up a meeting with your pastor Scott, and I will bring a witness, because after so many lies, I don't trust anyone but God. And I am not mad at your Pastor. I am sad that he has done this, keeping you from talking to me for 5 years! It is mind boggling. It is bizarre. It is crazy. No Christian does this. This is what the Muslims do, or the cults, or crazies. Please talk, sit and ask how we are doing, sit and let us tell you what we went through. When you were kept away from us for all this time. Let us ask you what you went through. Let us weep and talk and be a family again.
Until then, I will keep knocking on your doors, I will keep writing, I will even give interviews which I have avoided doing in the past. I will let the articles be written in newspapers, I will not avoid the calls from major media outlets. Because I have nothing to hide. It's all out there. And your hiding from me, not talking, only makes you all look guilty of something sinister.
And I will speak hoping that no one else has to endure what our family has had to endure, and so many other families have endured. And I love you so much. I long for God to take me to heaven, but maybe I am the only wounded person who is bold enough to make our horror story public. If I cared about my reputation, I would not say anything, but Pastor has turned my children against me and us, so what the heck. Nothing but the truth matters. Truth crushed to the ground will rise again. And it is rising. All the secret meetings and things being done, are being revealed and I am glad. Because only bad things are done in secret. The good things are made open and manifest for all to see IF they are really good or not.
I love you and will continue to try to you. Ok. So if you want me to be quiet. Then tell pastor Scott to give you all back to us. And he doesn't even need to apologize to me for what he and his leaders have done to me. That's between him and God. Just give us back our babies. All of them, and their spouses, and their children and their animals, all of them. Nothing left behind. They don't have to move home to NY, they just need to be restored to us again as children that love and honor their mother and father and sister, etc.
You said I need to go to Pastor Scott and apologize for my blog, and we can be a family again. Why? Jesus is slandered all the time, and he doesn't take their families from them. No real good man would keep children from their parents until he feels vindicated. Lay your life down Pastor Scott, turn the other cheek if you feel hurt, and give me back the children I birthed and raised.
I love all men, I hate lies and evil. Give me back my children Pastor Scott, stop twisting them to hate their own parents and relatives. It is not right.I will say good things about you when you do good things to me by giving me back my own dear children. I will even help you be a good man if I am able. I am not vindictive, and you do not need to apologize to me. Because God has my back. You just talk to him. He covers me with his wings. And I trust him to right the wrongs.
Love you all dear Jonathan, Sarah, Joshua, Christina, and my dear little grand babies, Penny Rose, Weston, Jackson, and Madeline.
Love and hugs and kisses from your very own mom and gramma.
